November 28, 2006

• Worried

  my sister left me a voicemail message crying inconsolably because my grandfather’s lung collapsed.  he had pneumonia earlier this month and as i was doing some research on collapsed lung tonight, it seems that spontaneous pneumothorax is caused by asthma, cystic fibrosis, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and pneumonia.  i’m worried that his time is coming close to an end and i don’t want to think about it.  but it’s the facts of life.  he is 93 years old and it’s bound to happen sooner or later for him.  i’m just sad that he is going senile and doesn’t really remember me or my sisters or my mother for that fact.  i take comfort that he did have a moment of clarity one time that i visited him at the nursing home.  he was so happy to see me and i was so happy he realized who i was.  he even asked if the baby that i was holding was mine.  then his moment of clarity passed and he asked my grandmother who i was and who’s baby i was carrying.  i guess i should hold onto my many memories of him and cherish the few moments we still have with him.  i just hope he makes it through and makes a full recovery from this collapsed lung. 

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